Problems.. Inspiration.. Something New I learn About Myself.

Each and everyone of us have their own problems and secrets that they have to cope with.

Some handle their problems better than others, some others the other way around.

There are others out there who already encountered major problems in life.

Whereas there is also others out there still living care-freely without any worries whatsoever. Little do they know that there is a very high possibility that there might be some "problems" instilled for them in the future. Fate works in a very mysterious way, nothing is certain.

When we say the word "problem", I am pretty sure each and everyone of us have a problem. The FIRST question that should come to mind is not HOW the problem should be SOLVED. But more importantly, HOW does one ENDURES and HANDLE their problem to begin with. We should know by now that a "problem" is not actually a "problem" if the solution for the "problem" can be thought of so easily. Obviously, a "problem" should be clearly defined as a "problem" when the solution for the problem is never certain. As you can see, "problem" can only be solved with the help of "time".

Typically, when one encounters a problem... A clear solution does not exist. Instead, the only option people have most of the time is to "wait and see how it goes".

Why are problems so damn annoying? Psychologically speaking, one would say that it has got to do with our core of thinking itself, our mind. Our brain consists of complex systems which are intertwined with one another. These sets of complex systems beautifully merges with one another to make everything work under a single system. One thing about Psychology is that different perspectives always arises and what makes them interesting is none of them are actually absolute. No one can clearly set the line and say which one is completely correct and wrong. So what we do is we basically refer to all these different perspectives to make sense of the human system........ I have wondered too far off here, lets take a few step backwards now. Why are problems so damn annoying? Some psychologist believes that our brain is always working 24 hours a day. It continually works even when we are asleep. In other words, our brain is like a super computer.

Now, imagine what happens when our brain encounters a problem? Obviously our brain will literally work its ass off to figure out the solution. Usually when it comes to mathematical problems for example, it puts a very high amount of pressure towards our brain when we are figuring out the answers to the problem. However, when the solution is gained, the pressure slowly fades away. Why? Because the brain is finally relieved from figuring out the solution. The longer the brain has to figure out a solution, the more the pressure adds up.... But... What happens if the problem couldn't be solved through thinking alone? Well, some say that we could simply think about something else instead and ignore it. However, some psychologist says that no matter how deliberately we try to ignore the subject matter, the brain will always unconsciously figure out the solution towards the problem even though the solution does not exist. Therefore, more and more pressure is built up as the time passes by. In other words, we will still feel pressured no matter how much we try to hide it.

Now, different people cope with their problems differently. This should be our main focus. Why?Because this in a way, will define who we are. Why is this so important? Well, if I have to point it out myself, there are many well-known people out there who is admired just because of how they handled their dark past. These people are admired because of how they overcome the problems many others fail to overcome themselves. These people inspires those out there... They became others source of inspiration...They are the very existence that proves problems can be solved no matter how ridiculous it may seem... People are relieved to know when their problems are insignificant when compared to some of those out there in the world.

Lets take people around you for example. I am pretty sure you have seen loads of different type of people so far. Some are the quiet type, some are easy going, some are simply irritating. Now when it comes to problem, we can see how these people cope up with theirs. Some keep their problems to their selves and managed to handle their problems professionally. Some others fail to keep their cool and instead become an over-dramatic queen who tells the whole world about his/her "problems" as if she/he is the only unlucky being on the face of this earth. Believe me when I say there are others out there who has problems that are unimaginably cruel. But still, some of the people out there who has to confront with this overwhelming "problems" somehow managed to keep their "cool". How is this possible?

Not many people are capable of keeping their cool when they are facing problems of their own. Most of the time they can't handle it and what they do is they try to find ways to help them feel fine such as expressing to their loved ones about how they feel deep inside. But not everyone does so in a positive way. There are times in our life when we see people trying to escape the harshness of reality by exercising, playing, hanging out, smoking, fighting, causing more problems and such.

Do you guys now see why I mentioned previously that our ways of confronting our problems will define who we are? People will always remain being who they are as long as no other events occur that will change it otherwise. There are sayings that simply goes like "You will know who that person truly is when he/she is facing problems". How come? Well, I believe that when people are facing problems, these problems will have a high chance of shaping the person's future way of thinking and behavior.

Let's just give a typical example to understand this better. Most of the time we can see girls/boys at our young age complaining about the ones they are in love with. How do they handle the outcome when they found out their "loved" ones cheat on them or dump them for reasons they can't accept? On facebook for example, we see girls posting status updates such as "All guys are the same! They never understand us! They are liars! They are a lying piece of sh-". Sadly, this also goes the same to the dudes.... We can see some dudes who says "Every girls are the same. I might as well stay single. Bros before Hoes~!"......... Which is really really really quite SAD if you ask me.

Because of the personal problem they faced, most of them will generate a stereotype form of thinking. I'd say this is natural as the brain is simply creating a defensive mechanism that will prevent the host from repeating the same mistake. However, it is good to know that knowledge overcomes our stereotypes.

So where were we? Oh yeah. Problems -> Stereotypes -> Alters belief and action -> Slightly/moderately/highly changes who we are. Of course, this is only just an example. There are many other different ways "problems" can change our personality.

To keep things short and meaningful, I would just like to say be careful and be smart on how you handle your problems. Bear in mind that some problems could not be solved with your own power alone and that some problems can only be solved due time. We should not let problems degrade our qualities as a respectful human being we ought to be.

The reason I am writing this post is basically to portray a bit of my problems without actually telling what the problem actually is. I am not the type of person who likes to share my problems with other people, and most of the time even if I accidentally or intentionally shared the story of my problems to others, I usually end up regretting it. Some times, problems should be kept to ourselves, and how to handle such problems is entirely up to you (sometimes.. but most of the time in my case I guess).

How do you perceive your own character? There are times when I noticed my character is a bit messed up seeing how my likes and dislikes can clash with one another depending on the situation. I have loads of negative views and perceptions that I have in mind but what I usually let out for people to see are only the nice ones. Usually I curse a lot, I curse so much that people around me sometimes feel uncomfortable due to the negative energy I bring out (I made this assumption when I notice how people's facial expression started to slowly change, and most of the time when this happens I quickly decided to shut my mouth seeing how negative it is being). Well, I guess that is most probably my fault for hanging out with the wrong peers in school. Luckily I managed to restrain myself and then slowly change myself from being that kind of person.

I find it truly hard to define myself as I believe in a few principles that I have set up in my mind but I find it difficult to physically apply such principles.

I noticed that previously I usually had this problem on how to clearly define myself properly most of the time I find my personality contradicting.

However, that is no longer the case. Spending most of my time away from UIA, I managed to do what I love most which is by having my own free space of spending my own sweet time internally speaking intrapersonally with my own self. By having time to do so, I have noticed some things about me that never actually changed for a very long time...

I am easily inspired... But it is hard for me to stay inspired for a very long time due to the fact that I usually find out something that I am disappointed with sooner or later towards that specific thing/person that I am inspired with...

I have my own beliefs and understandings on general matters but I don't usually express it to people unless necessary.

I don't like communicating with new people as I do not like my character to be judged. People usually judge a person and adapt to that person by their understanding of others character from their first confrontation with one another. In other words, this is also known as our first impression. Most of the time, people firstly try to have some conversations with the new person. Once they have gathered the necessary information of that person, later they will reorganize that information and analyze it for future reference. What people usually do first is to decide whether or not should they befriend with such person on the first place. If so, they will decide to ignore future confrontation or add more confrontation with that specific person according to the decision made.

People often think that by frequently meeting with the person over and over again, they might slowly and surely start to learn more about the person itself and then from there they can adapt themselves better to communicate with that person. But people should bear in mind that no matter how many times you meet that person over and over again, if that person itself decides to put up a fake front and conceal their true self each and every time they confront with one another, they can never truly learn more about the person they are talking to.

One more significant thing that I learned about myself is that I am not that mysterious nor am I that difficult to be understood. Its just that I refuse to let people into my life for reasons I have yet to discover. I don't like being misjudged but then again I purposely put up a fake front each and every time a confrontation is made. I guess this is just a bad habit of mine that I haven't yet changed and I myself am confused whether or not this habit of mine should be changed in the first place.

I admit that I am an antisocial type of person, but I can easily have a conversation with people if I want to. But the problem is, I don't want to. I only have conversations with people and build friendship in situations that seems necessary.

Other than that, the people I have approached so far are only people that I am personally interested with and most of them are kind and interesting people that I am interested to make friends with. I noticed this I am very greedy in terms of choosing who I befriend with. But so far, I cant complain since I like each and everyone who is in my circle of friends.

Today I have learned more about myself. I am not so "self-contradicting" and "difficult" as I previously and frequently say I am. I am only "self-contradicting" because I purposely wear a mask when I confront people whom I am not comfortable with. But I have noticed that this mask can easily be shaken if I am confronted with people who appear to be kind in my point of view. I have this thing about me and I guess I simply like to have conversations with those who are kind. Also, I am only "difficult" because I choose to be that way. When I move away the haze and clouds that disturbs my view, who I am and what I am is actually very clear in front of me. No more confusion, no more contradiction, no more difficulties. I am actually quite a simple person hohoho~

Inspiration.

I am the type of person who is easily inspired by people around me and most of the time these people doesn't even notice how inspiring they actually are. Be it in physical aspects or in other areas that involves creativity and the power of language and writing, I am easily inspired by all.

Most of the time, these people I am inspired with have their very own sets of belief and criteria that they have set in mind. Rather than what they have accomplished and what they are capable of accomplishing, the way of thinking they have in their mind is what makes them incredibly amazing to begin with.

Parkour/Tricking/Freerunning for example... Some simply look at them like idiots who never considered the risk and consequences you get when you fall. But this perception is far from true. These people have beliefs set in their mind that will set you people on awe. By entering their way of thinking and perception they have in life, you will notice how ridiculously amazing their perceptions actually are. This perception of theirs are most of the time ILLOGICAL to have in mind with out rational thinking alone.... but TRUE. It is true that no matter how many times we train ourselves to jump from a 2nd storey building, it does not make the jump any shorter. It is true that training gives us strength. But if we are really simply talking about strength alone, wouldn't that mean each and every highly active basketball players can do what we do and do it better in the first place? Technique? So do you guys really believe that technique is ALL there is to it? Does that mean by learning the technique alone, these basketball players can easily jump from the 2nd storey building like tracheurs do?

Technique is the key to unlock the door.

Strength is required to twist the door knob.

But both of these are not the ones required to push the door open.

The thing that we need to have in order to push the door open, is self confidence.

What mostly changes overtime through practice is not our strength or technique, but mostly our self confidence. Why am I talking about this? Because I notice that some amazing athletes in the world of freerunning are soooo CRAZY to an extent that their self-confidence are absurdly illogical to be applied to normal people.. But this set of thinking is absolutely true when we actually spend some time to think about it.

Of course no matter how much we train ourselves, the jump that we are going to do from the 2nd storey building will not be any shorter. What changes are simply our self confidence. No matter how strong we really are and no matter how much technique we have mastered in our mind... By the time we are doing it, if we do not have any self confidence, shit happens. That is why most tracheurs encounter injury most of the time. May it be a difficult move or a simple move, most of the time the most serious injury inflicted to tracheurs are from SIMPLE MOVES. It is almost stupid if we actually spend our time to think about it. Just because we lack self confidence, we did not make that extra jump, we did not keep our proper form, and thus we fail and land miserably on the ground. This would all end very differently and beautifully if we simply had self confidence to begin with.

Also there are other types of people whom I am easily inspired with. Most of the time I am easily inspired by those who can easily express themselves. I am inspired by those who can express themselves by easily typing sooooooooooo loooooooooong but yet their way of writing managed to catch and keep the interest of the readers all the way to then end. I am inspired by those who can easily express themselves and make themselves look stupid in front of the camera but in an entertaining way rather than "irritating". They know the lines between being too excessive in showing expressions and being too dull in not showing enough expressions.

Most of the time, I am usually inspired by those who hold close to a certain principle that sounds soooo incredible to an extent that holding to that principle alone shows how amazing that person actually is.

Okay, I guess that is enough for now. Let me just share to you guys what I have done so far during this holiday.

-Joined Sejuta Impian and managed to get rm20k

-Joined Axn Big Challenge Kuala Lumpur and got into the top 10.

-Joined Sasuke Malaysia

-Made a new video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRIi3TxqAsM&feature=youtu.be

Until next time. :)

Paras|te|sAnEx|stence